Manners have always been important to me. It’s how I was raised. I strive to exhibit good manners in my dealings with others, and it’s what I expect in return. I expect you to say thank you and please. I expect you to hold the door for the person behind you. I expect you to treat the people that cross your path with kindness and respect.

Several years ago I ran into a former classmate. She’d had some family problems and the kids in school weren’t always kind. As we parted, she said, “You know, you were always nice to me, even when no one else was. Thanks. I really appreciated that.” I remember thinking about how sad and alone she must have felt that she would mention it so many years later.

Another time last year, I was standing in line at a Speedway gas station. I recognized the clerk. He had helped me several times before, was always very polite and had a habit of saying, “Be safe out there,” to his customers as they were leaving.

On this particular visit, however, a large man was very angry and giving the clerk a hard time, ranting and calling him names. I didn’t hear what it was about, but I couldn’t believe that the kind clerk I know would have provoked an argument. True to form, he remained calm until the man left. As I reached the counter, I didn’t say a word, but gave the clerk a sympathetic look. That’s all it took, and he said to me, “You know, I just don’t get it. Why do some people have to be so nasty? We’re all in this together.”

I love that Speedway clerk. We share a like mind. But, in reflection, I have to admit, I’ve had my large, angry man moments. They don’t take the form of ranting public displays, but nonetheless, they are not proud moments. It’s times like this I have to remind myself that we don’t all share the same experiences – nor would we all react in the same way even if we did.

I don’t know what was happening in large, angry man’s life. Maybe his wife just left him. Maybe he’s exhausted from taking care of his father with Alzheimer’s. Maybe he just got fired from his job and is worried about how he’s going to feed his five kids. Maybe… maybe… maybe… I don’t know.

But, this is what I do know. Hurt people will hurt other people.

Being kind when you are being treated unfair is extremely hard. “Only the weak are cruel. Gentleness can be expected only from the strong.” I read that somewhere. I like it. I struggle with it. You are better. Not better than the person, but better than the behavior. That person is truly miserable if their only way of coping is to drag you down. Fighting back won’t ease their hurt. It will only increase yours.

I love the “pay it forward” idea. I love that Be Safe Out There clerk didn’t pay it forward. I love the hopeful idea that large, angry man did.

Sometimes I forget not everyone knows what I know. Sometimes I even forget that I know what I know. Be kind. We’re all in this together.

The Tuesday Spiritual Column is entirely the opinion of this week’s writer and does not necessarily reflect the view of Northview Church as a whole.

by Mel Carpenter

As Christians, we celebrate special holidays and moments within the community of our church. Of all the traditions and ceremonies, communion, referred to as the Lord’s Supper, is a remembrance of the very heart of our faith. The evangelist Billy Graham stated, “On the cross Jesus Christ–who was without sin–took all our sins upon Himself, and He endured the judgment we deserve. The Lord’s Supper points us to this great truth. Thank God for His love and thank Him most of all for Christ’s sacrifice for you.”

The first communion was at the Last Supper and was given by Christ himself. It was a dinner of great significance like no other during Christ’s time on earth. From I Corinthians 11:24, Paul tells us that “The Lord Jesus took bread, and when He had given thanks to God for it, He broke it and gave it to His disciples and said, ‘Take this and eat it. This is my body, which is given for you. Do this to remember me.” In the same way, He took the cup of wine after supper, saying, “This cup is the new agreement between God and you that has been established and set in motion by my blood. Do this in remembrance of me whenever you drink it.”

Christ was very specific in telling us to always take communion to remember Him. Communion is a great reminder of our gift of salvation and a true memorial to Jesus Christ’s love for us. It is a time to reflect and be humbly grateful for our intimate relationship with Him and His ultimate sacrifice for us. John 3:16, the most quoted verse in the Bible, said it all: “For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.” Communion is a holy time recalling and honoring that in an intimate way.

Northview Church’s Carmel campus has open communion for believers in Jesus Christ. Communion is not only held in our church services; it is also available following Saturday’s 5 p.m. service and on Sundays between the 9 a.m. and 11 a.m. service in the Chapel. During Easter weekend, more than 430 church attendees partook in communion that’s offered there.

Visit the Chapel to experience communion and the “peace that passes all understanding” when you celebrate Christ’s life and remember His sacrifice for us, His Christian followers. Communion is also a time to look to the great future that He has promised us with everlasting life as forgiven believers in the Kingdom of Heaven with Christ our Lord.

Is there anything quite like the bond between a mother and her son? You hold him in your arms as a baby and pray for the man he will someday become, but between birth and manhood is that navigational minefield called the teenage years!

Student Ministry Pastor Kurt Brodbeck of Northview Church’s Carmel campus is attempting to give parents tools to navigate that minefield.

“For years, parents dropped their teens off to the youth ministry with the mindset that we were the experts,” Brodbeck said. “We want to switch the script and tell the parents, ‘you’re the experts; we’re just the support staff. Tell us how we can support you.”

Brodbeck talked to parents of high school students and heard specifically from mothers about the importance of understanding gender differences.

“What I heard from moms was that teenage boys need to be taught the hurtful power of their words. What they say matters,” he said. “How a boy speaks to a girl at this age sticks with them. It often shapes their identity now and in the future. We want to build men of God; men that choose not to manipulate with their words but to use them to build friendships.”

A man learns how to treat a woman, in big part through his relationship with his mother, so what better way to teach respect for women than with some fun between moms and their sons?

In the past few years, Kurt has been involved in a local charity event called Indianapolis Adventure Race. Combining his love for adventure racing and the grounds of Northview Church seemed like a great fit to open the doors of communication and give moms the opportunity to speak to their teenage sons.

The adventure, called Take Back the Hill, will begin at North Beach with each mother/son team receiving a map that will lead to various checkpoints and will continue around Carmel combining running, biking, and orienteering as the teams do an activity at each checkpoint that highlights gender differences. The theme will not be difficult, but FUN! A few examples of checkpoints in the works include:

• A makeup station – where the boys put on the makeup!

• O’Malia Food Market trip – a quick bike ride to the local grocery store, where the boys go in with the shopping list, while the moms wait in the parking lot!

• Orienteering and some running for the boys, while Mom relaxes in a lawn chair sipping lemonade.

Lunch (with a fun twist!) will be served halfway through the adventure race to give the moms a chance to further communicate with their sons.

“This is a fun event that sets moms up to win,” Brodbeck said. “Moms can use the day to have an important conversation with their sons about how to treat women with integrity.”

The event is for boys in grades 7-12 and their moms and will be held on June 9 at 10 a.m. at North Beach. For more information and to register for the event go to http://ow.ly/aVMU8.

Photo by Kurt Hostetler

Indiana is the record holder for the largest children’s museum and for the smallest art gallery of its kind in the world. And now, on July 14, Indiana will attempt to be the Guinness record holder for the largest 30-minute Zumba class. The Little Red Door Cancer Agency is organizing an event named The Big Red Bash and hopes to see more than 3,200 people in attendance having fun with friends, exercising and breaking a world record.

The Little Red Door’s mission provides free breast, prostate and cervical cancer screenings year-round as well as special programs including wigs, transportation, breast prostheses and bras, incontinence supplies, ostomy and medical supplies and free nutrition supplements. There is also a camp named Camp Little Red Door for children ages 8-18 who have cancer or are in remission.

In order to kick off this event, a flash mob was held April 25 in the Indianapolis City Market where Indianapolis Mayor Greg Ballard spoke and the Big Red Bash was officially announced.

Of the 500 Zumba instructors considered for this event, four were chosen; one of them is Northview Church’s very own Michele McKay. McKay, a former worship program coordinator with the Carmel campus, is also a Zumba fitness instructor and has taught fitness classes at Northview.

“I’m very honored to be one of the instructors selected here to do this,” McKay said. “I believe that God is promoting what we have to offer here at Northview, and this is our chance to get our name out even more to the community. I’m really hoping that Northview people will help me with the goal.”

Zumba isn’t just a dance for people trying to lose weight. The class is a time to bond, help people feel better about themselves and get connected to God, according to McKay.

“I think that God uses us in whatever way we are willing to be used – however big or small,” McKay said. “There have been quite a few families that have gotten plugged into Northview because of the women who attend Zumba or one of the other fitness classes we offer. All of our fitness instructors strive to show that while we care about the health of our bodies, it’s not about having a perfect body. It’s about taking care of the body God gave us, keeping it strong and healthy, and having fun and making friends while we are doing it.

“Several women who attend Northview and our classes are great because they see the potential to create relationships with the women in our community who are unchurched and will ultimately make a decision to try Northview because of that relationship that has been built. We are breaking down walls for people who don’t understand what it means to follow Christ and think that it is scary or that we’re full of rules to follow, etc. They get to see joyful women who have a wonderful sense of humor, love to have fun and still think that serving God is awesome.”

The Big Red Bash will take 30 minutes and each person taking part will have to move the whole time and not stop for more than one to two minutes – just long enough for a drink of water. The class will incorporate salsa and cumbia dancing as well as a warm up and cool down; the elements are so easy, anyone can participate.

“Now I’m asking for Northview to rise once again to another challenge,” McKay said. “Whether they do Zumba or not, it is a fun day, it is simple to do, it’s free and it’s all for Little Red Door so they can help people with cancer. If we have people who have been affected by cancer in some way – and most of us do – we should be there.”

If you would like to take part in the Big Red Bash, go to www.littlereddoor.org and register under Michele McKay’s name. You can also e-mail her at fitness@northviewchurch.us with questions.

Photo by Kelli Butler

Ghana West Africa President John Atta Mills and his wife, Her Excellency Dr. (Mrs.) Ernestina Naadu Mills, have a dream. They want every high school student in Ghana to have a Bible – all 500,000 of them.

The President and his wife are both Christians who value God’s word and are “committed to its practice.” Recently, the minority Muslim population in Ghana has experienced growth and influence. The President and his wife are unsure how much longer their Christian influence will be in the country they love dearly, as this is an election year. That is why Her Excellency approached Tyndale House Publishers and asked if they would partner with her to help reach the young people of Ghana with the transforming Word of God.

In a letter Dr. Mills writes to the students she hopes to reach for Christ, she boldly states: “If you will devote yourself to learn about Jesus Christ and develop a personal relationship with Him, it will be of great profit to you. You will gain wisdom and understanding from the Bible that you cannot get anywhere else. This is the best preparation you can make to live a fully functional life; to be at peace with God; and to effectively serve Christ and your family, this nation, and humanity.”

This letter is found within a hard cover of the Smyth Sewn NLT Bible, decorated in the colors of the Ghana flag. These Bibles will be given to students at an assembly hosted by Her Excellency in Ghana, West Africa, in the fall of 2012.

The staff at Northview Church’s Carmel campus couldn’t wait to help make as many Bibles available for students in Ghana as possible. Now through June 1, you can purchase a Bible for a student in Ghana for only $6 at Capstone Café and Bookstore.

To reduce shipping costs, Tyndale House Publishing has sent out bookplates that can be purchased to represent the Bibles that will be sent directly to Ghana from the publisher. Each bookplate, signed by the purchaser, will be sent to Tyndale and then placed inside a Bible and given to a student in Ghana during the assembly this fall.

Capstone has sold approximately 650 Bibles for Ghana students but hopes to sell hundreds more. Customers like Julia Buckingham and Jesse Beckley have played a big part in making that happen.

Twelve-year-old Julia Buckingham came into Capstone with all of her birthday and Christmas money ready to purchase Bibles for Ghana students.

“I had been thinking about kids in Africa a lot,” Julia said. “I asked God where I could donate to help kids, and the next day I saw the video about the Ghana Bibles.

“I told my mom that I wanted to use my $60 to buy the Bibles, and she said, ‘What?’ I just knew I was doing what I was supposed to be doing. I already have so much. I have been so blessed; they need Bibles more than I need the money.”

Julia’s gift of 10 Bibles became 30 when both her mom and dad chose to match her selfless gift.

Jesse Beckley’s generous heart also surprised Capstone employees when he came in to purchase 250 Bibles for Ghana students last week. When asked if he had a personal connection to Ghana that made him want to give so much, he humbly answered, “No, I just felt like this was important to do.”

If you also feel like spreading the Word of God in Ghana, West Africa, is an important project, stop by Capstone to purchase a Bible for $6 before June 1.

Photo by Dennis McClintock

You’ve heard the expression “There’s an app for that!” With over 500,000 applications for the iPhone, you’ll likely find an application for just about everything, including information about Northview Church.

Northview Church’s Carmel campus decided to create an application for the iPhone in order to offer attendees of both campuses the ability to easily access information from their mobile phones, according to Megan Murphy, IT director.

Northview attendee Jim Parshall volunteered to create the application. Murphy worked with Parshall to help guide the content that was in the application and oversee the project.

Current features include messages, events, Good Neighbor, connecting and information. Murphy stated that she anticipates updates to the application in the future.

“Other than feature requests, everything has been really positive and everyone seems to really like what we included in the app,” Murphy said.

In addition to this download opportunity for Apple fans, Northview currently has a group of people who have stepped up to create an app for Android users.

“We don’t have an expected arrival date just yet, but we hope to launch an app with very similar features to the iPhone app,” Murphy said.

The app has an average 5-star user rating as of April 16, 2012, and all posted comments mention the app being a user-friendly resource.

For any interested iPhone owners, the application is free to download, is 1.1 MB and can be found by searching “Northview Church” in the App Store.

“I’m scared!” my 7 year-old son said to me as the rain started pounding the window and the thunder began rolling. “It will be all right,” I told him. “But I am afraid, Mom! What if we have a tornado?!?”

This quickly ignited the anxiety of my 3 year-old, who began chiming in with his concerns. I tell them both, “Mommy has watched the weather. It’s just a small rain shower, guys. No worries!” The fear in them does not subside.

Have you ever had this happen with your own kids or someone’s kids you are watching? They are all afraid of something — storms, monsters under the bed, the teen across the street with the funny hair. However, you know there is nothing to fear. You are an adult; you know more about life, and for the most part, you know when you are and are not in danger.

My anxiety started to rise due to frustration. You see, I knew there was not any severe weather in the forecast. I knew we would hear the sirens if something changed or the TV would alert us to take shelter. I felt in control. I just wished they could trust me.

If they only knew Mommy always has their best interests at heart. If they only knew when I make them eat their veggies it’s so they will one day be strong like Daddy.

If they only knew that proper discipline today will help them have good character tomorrow. If they only knew that I make them do their homework so that one day they can get a good job and provide for their family. If they only knew that I will be their shelter in a storm and protect them from any physical or emotional harm within my control. If they only knew I would lay down my life for them.

If they could just trust me. If they knew my heart, they would trust me.

No sooner than I had this thought, God quickly held a mirror up to my face. He said, “I understand how you feel right now. This is kind of what you sound like every day!”

I almost laughed out loud at the truth in this and how I totally got His point! Wow. Yes. That is me. I’m the one that always wonders what He is up to. I’m the one who is wondering why I have to “eat my spiritual veggies and do my purpose-driven homework.” I’m the one afraid to step out of the boat because I fear He won’t protect me in the storm. Ironic, isn’t it?

God is looking down on me replying to each of the thoughts I had about my kids. He says, “If only you knew I have your best interest at heart. If only you knew this discipline today will help you grow like Me tomorrow. If only you knew I will be your shelter in the storm and will give you strength to deal with any emotional or physical harm that comes your way. If only you would remember, I laid down my son’s life for you. If you would just trust me. If you knew my heart, you would trust me.”

Know Him. Trust Him. He has our best interest in His heart each day.

The Tuesday Spiritual Column is entirely the opinion of this week’s writer and does not necessarily reflect the view of Northview Church as a whole.